Birds, and Seals, and Bellboys, OH MY!

So, Human One, which is actually my favorite Human (although if you tell Human Two that he gets very upset, heh heh..Human Two is the good cop, Human one is the bad cop...you figure it out) buys a new "sound machine" that apparently helps Humans sleep, although I have found that if you sit on one of their faces at 5:00AM it negates that effect.

I do not know why Human One needed a new sound machine, as the old one was perfectly fine, but I find Humans spend money when they do not have to and have stopped trying to understand it. Apparently they wanted one with the sound of the ocean, but no birds. I found the sound of screeching seagulls comforting as I slept, but apparently my vote was not counted).

Anyway, the new sound machine comes and without reading directions (of course my Humans are male, as female Humans read directions) it is set up. So it's time to go to bed and it's turned on.
This is their conversation, verbatim:

H1 "Oh that's nice, really sounds like the ocean."
H2 "Hmm."
H1, some minutes later "Was that a bird? I swear I heard a single bird."
H2 "Didn't hear it."

Time passes

H2 "That's a f-ing seal, they have damn seals on this thing!"
H1 'I didn't hear a seal."
H2 "It was an f-ing seal, I heard it."

Time passes

H1 "Damn it...a foghorn? A flipping foghorn? Who can sleep though a damn foghorn?"
H2 "and seals!!!"
H1 " What the hell was that? A bell?? A ships bell??? This is ridiculous!"
H2 "birds and seals and bells, oh my."
H1 "NOT funny. This damn thing is going back...no way can I sleep through seals, bells, foghorns. I just want the ocean!"

Next morning

H1 'Did you turn it off last night? it's not on."
H2 'Yup, there was a flock of gulls screaming."
H1 'You mean the one gull?"
H2 'No, a whole flock, I can't believe it didn't wake you up."
H1 'A whole flock?"
H2 'A whole screaming flock!"

Needless to say, it was sent back, and another purchased that just has ocean sounds on the ocean channel.
Humans...go figure!